Saturday, September 24, 2011
Friday, September 23, 2011
Thursday, September 22, 2011
Tuesday, September 20, 2011
Monday, August 15, 2011
The Trenchant Teabagger...
She's the current front runner, and her back sides not running too badly either.
In this time of the great debate debacle over our national IOU,
She's been declared the winner in the state of I-O-Way!
And it's in this, her home state of disarray that the telegenial Miss Bombchelle walked away with top honors in the informal, inbred, institutional caucus of older, white, rural and evangelical hayseeds.
But please don't take my word for it, or even hers for that matter, because along with her winning poll numbers, she gets to hold the various and nefarious, not to mention simultarious titles of Miss Representative, Miss Spoken, Miss Judgement, Miss Taken, and Sub-Missive Mistress of the media for the next news cycle or until Snooki gets her next alcohol induced walking blackout.
Stay Tuned Tease Party Teabaggers,
The great electoral scrotum is about to descend!
Open Wide!!!
Tuesday, August 2, 2011
Treaddy,The Trenchant Teabagger 'Sez...
That's right Teabaggers, Treaddy (Our ever present Tease Party Mascot) just said a mouthful. The whole national mood has just shifted into heightened Teabagger mode! Everyone, young and old, has just gotten a taste of the Teabagger venom. And the poison is spreading - Check out the Stock Market's swing, Grand Ma's 401K has taken a bite, college tuition, credit card swipes, mortgage rates... you name it!
The whole nation is in arousal following Treaddy's lead.
Before too long, the national currency motto won't be E Pluribus Unum, it'll be...
Sunday, July 3, 2011
Monday, April 11, 2011
Tuesday, April 5, 2011
The National Tease Party - SHOW-GIRLZ EDITION!
She's a Show-Girl on the make right now, and boy oh boy, she 'Sho is makin' it now!
From Iowa to I-O-Way
From way out yonder in the Paw Paw Patch.
This Bombchele's notorious media "Bubble Dance" has garnered her enough press to put her on the national radar of every producer out there in Talk Radio and TV Reality-Land.
Destined for Rapture and Fame, this one-woman "Situation" is a true "Survivor", and could be "Dancing With The Stars" come next year's "Prime Time".
Trust Me...
This Show-Girlz future is definitely "Behind" her!
Modesty is no commodity in her book
And her book is an open life
Meant to be read between the lines
The Unemployment line
And
The Bread line
Spare some change, anyone?
Can you spare a Dime?
How about a paradigm?
I'll see YOUR pair
And Raise you mine!
With Treaddy,
The Tease Party Trouser Snake
(He's Funny!)
And Dix Steele, your Ring Master General
Give Him A Ring Sometime!
Thursday, March 31, 2011
The Trenchant Teabagger - Dix Steele
Listen Up, Dick Bags!
This is your Ringmaster General Speaking.
And by now you all know how to respond to your Ring Masters Voice.
ARF!!!
Now, sit up and beg in your best little Teabagger Doggie Style Pose.
Listen closely while I blow Sweet Little Dog Whistle Nothings in your ear for good measure....
AAAHHH-WOOOOOO!!!!!!
And now, for good measure, let's get down to Brass Tacks.
What's that you say, Brass is Taxed enough all ready?
Then we need to repeal the Brass Tax and settle for the Brass Knuckles.
Which, I've heard, is a Job Killing Initiative.
When what we really need is to Get Busy with some Affirmative Action on a Pro-Jobs Agenda.
And My Agenda has always been about getting some affirmative action in the form of a good old fashioned Pro Job.
And as we all know, the best Pro Jobs are done By Hand here in the good ol' US of A.
A of course, standing for A-bysmal, as in
"In The Hole",
Staying at the Holiday "Inn (Of) Debt",
Where?
"Under", Where!
For Now, For Closure, and Forever After.
It's a series of A-bysmal Holes we're in now.
Which makes us the U.S. of A-Holes I Wreckon!
Did you say Wrecked 'Em?
Hell... We Killed 'Em!!!
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
The Trenchant Teabagger
OPEN WIDE, SCROTUM SUCKERS!
IT'S TEABAGGER TIME AGAIN!
And who better to settle back and lap up Teabag Truisms with, than The National Tease Party's very own mascot -
Treaddy
The One-Eyed Tease Party Trousersnake!
He's everyone's favorite myopic minded focus group, lobbying for the thing that that Disorders HIS Attention - Deficits!
With his constitutionally enhanced Gulp-Ability, coupled with a jaw that comes unhinged at a moments notice, Treaddy displays an almost super human ability to swallow the most implausable of concepts! And when you add in his superb skills to ignore all superfluous details and conflicting evidence, you have a Reptilian Brain to be reckoned with!
So Drink Up, Teabaggers!
Concentrated, Narrowly Focused, and Like-Minded Social Media is where it's at!
Sunday, March 27, 2011
The Trenchant Teabagger
Here she is ladies and gentlemen, the rock star of The National Tease Party, fresh off of her most recent appearance in the great state of Iowa, the one, the only,
The Teabagger's #1 Poll and Scrotum Stuffer-
Blaze Bombchele,!
Ms Bombchele, star of staged scream media, was recently voted the hottest congressional seat in the 6th district by the God & Guns Foundation of Greater Pine County in North Central Minnesota
And she knows how to shine in that media bubble she was born to perform in. Everyone takes notice when she shows up for her latest media gig, just holding their collective breath, waiting to see how much hot water she can dip herself into! From New Hampshire to Des Moines, this Bombchele knows how to heat up the base AND the Caucus Suckers every time she opens her mouth!
So Open Wide Teabaggers!
This Blaze is at her raciest when she's in the race!
Saturday, March 19, 2011
Wednesday, March 16, 2011
Friday, March 11, 2011
Tuesday, February 15, 2011
Obamacare For Dummies Pt 10/10 - "Erections Have Consequences For Ridgid Ideolouges"
And when Money Talks we all have a habit of listening, and it's high time we all start listening, because Time is Money, and Money is Time well spent!
And, as the old saying goes, doctors diagnose, but...
...So show me the Money!
If you show me yours I'll show you mine.
But what if we both come up short?
There probably isn't enough Time or Money to show me all the things I've been promised. Promises like Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of Crappiness, as so eloquently stated in our Confusion, in the Preambulatory Foreplay I believe, which gives us this prophetic caveat,
"The Tree of Liberty is a pole that needs to be vigilantly erected and frequently stroked."
And in closing, we must highly resolve that these Advance Health Care Directives shall not have Death Paneled in vain, that this nation, under-informed, shall have a new birth of Freeloading Dumbasses, and that government Of The People, By The People, and For The People, Shall NOT Ask Too Much From Me!
Friday, February 11, 2011
Obamacare For Dummies Pt 9/10 - "Because There IS No Insanity Clause"
But we must not fall victim to these lower electoral alimentary canards, nor should we allow the jurisdictive fellations of a few to sway the Au Naturale inclinations of us all. This distorted upswinging will lead to a downstroke of monumental ejaculations! A veritable orgy of all manner of discourses and downfalls. And believe you me, once it down falls, you can't get it to up fall again for at least 20 minutes!
Turgid insurrections will begin to mount, with a...
This Healthcarereform is nothing more than 5lbs of Bolshevism in a 2 lbs bag!
But wait! There's more!
If you enact now, we'll throw in an additional bag of Bolsheviks, absolutely Free!
Be the first one in your local emergency room with this Advanced Health Care Directive based on the notorious and decadent French Model!
Friday, February 4, 2011
Supreme Justice GaGa's Line Item Veto Act!
All Rise, For The Honerable And The Onerous, The Highest and The Least Shyest, The Supremiest And The Dreamiest, Justice GaGa And Her Bench Pressing Judicial Activising.
We are all gathered here today in the presence of the spectacular and rack-tacular Justice with the Bustice, to ratify, rectify, and generally OK-ify our very own constitutional prejaculatory introduction.
Here in Justice GaGa's court of "Pubic Opinion", she and she alone, rules as the number one Justice-of-the-Piece.
(And what a piece she is!)
So let it be known hereforth and henceforth, by the power vested in her well endowed vesting (See picture above!) shall stand these words as the opening act of our Great National Titty Show -
"In the case of an erection lasting more than four hours, used in order to perform a more perfected and prolonged union, (An established justification!) with insured prescription access, providing the lowest common denominator, promoting for genital welfare, securing the blessings of libido, both to ourselves and our posteriors, do ordain an established constitutional for any body, hot or not!"
Passed unanimously and un-animusly, this day forth, by Supreme Justice GaGa.
Court will now adjourn to the bar for Cock Tales and other stories of Juris Prudence, a local gal, famous for the 9:00 showing of her legal briefs, with a special tribute to the titular 2-Party system.
Friday, January 14, 2011
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